HAPPY 2TH MONTHS ANNIVERSARY!!!

DARLING, I LOVE U.
THANK FOR ALL THE CARE AND CONCERN THAT U SHOW TO ME DURING THIS PERIOD OF TIME.
I REALLY APPRECIATED IT.
I WOULD LIKE TO APOLOGISE FOR MY WILDNESS WHICH MAKE U WORRIED EVERYTIME.
I LOVE U!
I MISS U!
I WANT TO HUG U!
I WANT TO KISS U!
I WANT...............

HOPE EVERYTHING WILL MOVE ON SMOOTHLY...
LOVE U ALWAYS! MUACKZ!

i miss you so.
10:56 PM

E-learning week!!!

I stay at home the whole day doing nothing..
i did some of the e-learning stuffs..
rather tired after doing it..
Black-board was very laggy..
took a very long time to load the web-page..
after doing, i continue to watch Taiyou No Uta..
Its a very touching show..
can u imagine?
i cry while watching it?
below is the soundtrake of the show.
it's awersome!!!

stupid darling!
went for his training again..
leave me all alone at home..
sad!
but what to do?
nevermind, i can understand..
competition is round the corner, trainings are very important.
so, darling! u have to jia you! dont give up! i will always be there for you.
while i was writing this post, suddently i feel so lonely..
darling leaving for youths worlds soon..
no one will talk to me every night before i sleep..
no one will be there whenever i need him..
no one will be also there nagging at me..
no one!!! he is gone..
but i will believe that his spirits will be here for me every moments..
dont worry darling, i will still be strong when u are not around..
waiting for u to return..
love u always..
muackz!





This song starts off slowly with a guitar solo, which slowly opens up into a more powerful intro with other musical instruments typically used in bands. Kaoru’s vocals aren’t especially powerful but they seem to have the characteristic of sounding clear and emotional, especially during the chorus. The chorus is especially quite beautiful, the melody is so emotional and heart-rending, that one cannot help but be moved by this song.

The use of an acoustic guitar and electric guitar were used in the same song, and surprisingly they blended really well with each other. To fill the gaps by giving this ballad a more emotional edge, strings were used. This made the song sound more soothing and soften the ‘harder’ drumset accompaniment. The electric guitar is rather toned down in order to allow Kaoru’s weak vocal to stand out.

This song also boasts of an enchanting composition and artistic and emotional lyrics. The lyrics speak about how Kaoru hid herself from the light and how she was afraid to discover different emotions because she feared she would get hurt and how Kouji gave her light and colour in her life. The lyrics and composition were done by Maika Shiratori.

The fictional band which was used within the dorama was called “Moon Child”, inspired by Kaoru’s genetic disorder. This band consisted of a keyboard, a bass, electric guitar, a drumset and a vocalist. Kouji and his friends played the instruments after being inspired by Kouji playing his guitar, while Kaoru is the vocalist. This song certainly has a ‘band’ feeling, although it also has a definite ’studio’ feel, as if the original song was modified by a recording company to make it sound more professional and having a marketing quality.

However this song has some flaws. Kaoru’s vocals are a bit weak at some parts, as if she’s whispering or she doesn’t have the strength to continue singing. I’m not exactly sure if it was simply because her vocals are simply weak or if she was supposed to sound so. Nonetheless it’s quite impressive to see a person without any previous experience with singing to have such pleasant and soothing vocals which flow so well with the song.




This song is quite different from “Taiyou no Uta”. The tone is more light-hearted and playful. This ballad has a mid-tempo tone with a rather repetitive beat. The message seems to point at how a girl discovers love and consequently sees how beautiful life can be. Thus she doesn’t want her loved one to leave her.

Since it was the very first song Kaoru composed, I believe that it was especially composed to sound simple and uncomplicated to show how her skills were quite low at that time. The melody isn’t complex and thus it doesn’t stand out much. In fact it has a rather ‘indie’ feel, with an unpolished touch. The musical instruments are typical to groups or bands, making it sound as if “Moon Child” were playing this song. It’s definitely not a groundbreaking song but I find it’s so touching and sweet, in a manner that display the innocent feelings of a young girl so directly.


That's all for today. hope u all enjoy the songs.
Take care guys. =)

i miss you so.
4:12 PM

BURNT!!!


Have been away from home for the past 3 days.. Kinda miss my bed and stuffs.. I am tired.. Not enough sleep.. Each day never even sleep for more than 5 hours.. Can u imagine? I was damm tired that i slept in the powerboat and almost fell off from the boat.. Weather was bad too.. I am BURNT! Now I have a sun-glass tan-lined on my face.. damm ugly.. I need to wear because my eyes was swollen.. sighs! so sad.. COOKED LOBSTER!!!

Let's see what happen to the past 3 days...



18 may 2007:


Went to school in the morning..

I done my pratical and i took some photos of the experiment.


The whole day was terrible for me..

Stomach hurts the whole day..

Gastric pain or stomach pain?

This feeling is rather bad for me..

I hate to fall sick..

Mood swings..

Went to Daryl's bday party with soo mei and zhilong.

When we reach there, it was damm late..

Have some food then we went out for a walk..

Zhen Hao and ZhiLong went to 7-eleven to buy breezer..

I drank 3 bottles of peach breezer..

After i drink, i vomit everything out..

Terrible feeling..

But after that my stomach didn't hurts at all..

Later in the night, when to talk around with other sailor..

The conversation was really good..

You can sure laugh out loud man..

After talking, we went to sleep..

I only sleep for 3 hours and i walke up for the SRRR event.




this is the triangular wave.



weird wave! =X


advanced RL signal generator.


what a big watch i have man! cool right? =P


STUPID darling! still can continue to play while i am suffering! bad!!!




19 may 2007:

Woke up in the morning..

Took a cab down to Singapore River for the SRRR event..


Have a nice a talking session with the taxi driver..


Was feeling rather tired, so crap alot in the taxi!


Reach the place, and saw many water polo babes and dudes!


All of them was cool man!


What hot bodies they have!


Grace was crazy over all the girls la..


Keeping peeping on them..


hahas. if sam was there, grace, i think u will be dead man!


The guys are hot man!


I just cant stop my eyes staring at them.

oppos! =X


Later in the afternoon, the canoe polo got competition.


Their match was awersome man!


grace and i were thinking to learn canoe polo too.

Below are some photos that i took when the competition was going on!




see the small tiny canoe?


fierce competition!


NTU v.s. TP


get that ball'


this is call SPORTSMANSHIP!!! =)



20 may 2007:

It is the last day of the SRRR event..

Was feeling kinda happy and relieved..

The whole day in powerboat..

NO CAP and anything..

My head is BURNT!!

My face got the sun-glass tanned line..

hahas. looks rather weird when i look my self in the mirror.

The event ends rather early..

went home straight after the event..

feeling tired and sick after staying in the sun for long hours.

that's all for these 3 days.

take care guys!

i miss you so.
8:19 PM

1KG down!!!

today is rather a tired day. lesson starts from 8a.m and ends at 5p.m. i was having diarroea in the morning and i cant stop but to shit! lol. this is worst. the minute i stand up and step out of the toilet, i feel like shitting again! wth... MY ASSHOLE HURTS! after that, i forced myself to school and in the afternoon i shit again. did i eat anything wrongly?

After school, i went gym with darling, soo mei and zhilong again. we jogged on the treadmill for 15mins. then after went to do other equipments. i am tired! whole week having physical training. nevermind, i will endure! i can do it. is only the matter of wanting or not. =)

tommor, going for daryl's chalet! then saturday and sunday going for SRRR thing. i am really tired! that's all. i am going to sleep now! not enough sleep for the past few nights! good nights! take care guys! =)

darling, remember to take ur medicine. dont want to hear ur coughing again. love u. muack.

i miss you so.
11:32 PM

FAT girl on the street...

Today, school was rather tired for me. i am supposed to have lesson at 8a.m but i reach school at 8.30a.m. i was late for lesson again. My mood for today is horrible. I get damm pissed up with very small thing. Maybe is not enough sleep,plus i am having gastric pain the night before. The feeling was horrible. You wont to try it, i guess. lol.

Today, i had my maths quiz. guess how much did i scored? i got 30/100!!! can u imagine? i click on the wrong buttom and all the answer was wrong and i didnt bother to check and so i just click on the submit. There goes my quiz! dumb blond. zzz. nevermind, i noe how to do the quiz can le. =) After the quiz, the lecturer asks her to do tutorial 3 qns 1 & 2 . She says that if we come finish, she will not let us off for another lesson. This make me think that i am back to secondary schools life. The times when all teacher are chasing students for homework. I really miss my secondary school life. running around and making fun of ppl is my daily routine. lol. seems so fun la. can i go back to the times when i was wearing my uniform. =P

after everything, i accompany my classmates for lunch but i didnt eat all. i am on diet! i cant eat that much. lol. i want to lose weight! =) i can do it! endure man! then after eating, went for extra lesson. after that, i went for my training. i manage to jog 6 sounds. we do static training - pushes up, crutches, sit-ups.

when training is over, i went food court 3 for dinner. i ate ban mian and fruit juice. isnt it a healthy dinner? =X hahas. darling, going to scolds me again. coz i keep eating alot. =P hahas. tommor, i going gym again. yeah! i want to lose weight. hahas.that's all for today, i am feeling tired. take care guys. rest well. hope to see all of u. =)

QUEK ZHEN HAO! I LOVE U FOREVER!

i miss you so.
10:17 PM

I am FAT!!! I need to slim down! hahas. Zhen Hao wants me to slim down! can u imagine? He wants me to slim down 2kg each week. CRAZY right? lol. But now? i really on diet la. i also wants to slim down. Zhen Hao says that if i become FAT then he dont want me anymore. so sad! lol. just kidding la. =P Tommor i going gym with Zhen Hao, Soo Mei and Zhi Long. hahas. Soo Mei also fat la, so she wants to slim down also. whereas, zhilong wants to train his muscles. yeah! tommor i am going to exercise. so happy. quite looking forward to it. because it have been so long ever since i started having physical training. =X tommor, i will work my fats out man. i believe i can do it. ENDURE!!!

tommor i stay in the clubroom untill damm late. about 8.45p.m then i leave school to go kumon. when i was on the train going to serangoon, daddy called me ask me if i am going for kumon. guess what? i dont need go home by myself coz daddy fetching me home. hahas. today, i reach home at 10p.m. then went to take a hot bathe and sat down to have dinner. and now! after doing the things, i am here blogging. =)

that's all for today, i going back to watch my show - Taiyou No Uta (japanese show) sorry for the short post. lol. =) take care guys! hope to see all of u soon. smiles always. =)

DARLING, I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!!!

i miss you so.
10:50 PM

emoing!!!

i am really damm pissed off today. everything go wrong! i dont what had happen to me. i really feel like shit la. fuck off man! what had i done? what am i to u? u happy then u treat damm good but when u are angry, u treat like ur chu qi tou? what's all this? i know u are not angry with me at all. but the words u put me are like scolding me la. i cant stand it! scold all the vulguarities to me? arghz! hate all this man! i dont even think that u shd say call this to ur gf la. how do u think i will feel? i tell u seriously la. i really get damm affected by what u say each time. what must u be like this? u say i dont understand how u feel this morning? sorry ar! i know how u feel la. is that i nv show out only. u also say that i nv accompany u at all when u are sitting alone? excuse me. i am helping to rig the laser and the pico and taking out all the equipments la. i think u shd understand this lor. is not i dont want to accompany u but is i cant. i really dont noe what to do. sad sad! now, i just feel like crying out loud so that everyone can hear my cries!!! what's all this? i am not trying to get any attention from anyone la.

After ytd's promises u made to me, i thought everything will be fine. as in our relationship will get even better. but it seems that i am wrong again. i dont want to quarrel anything with u at all. but it seems that we will always quarrel over very small stuffs. why is it so? can u tell me what to do? i am really in a lost la. if the problem lies with me, please tell me. if i can change, i will defaintely change. you noe what in my mind now? i dont think i am fit to be ur gf la. i dont even noe how to make u happy when u are angry or sad. i will only add oil to the fire. and like what u say, i like to go against in what u say. arghz! i really cant be a gf as u think. i always make u jealous! what a bad gf am i? fuck man. arghz!!! my mind is exploding! can i scream at my top of my voice? AHhhhhhhhhhhhhhh....AAHhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!! can anyone teach me how to do? how to make my bf happy? how not to quarrel? how???

XINNI IS SAD BECAUSE YOU MAKE HER SAD!!!

why all this things had to happen? i am really damm stressed! tomor i am having my object oriented programming practical test!!! until now, i still dont even know a single shit at all. what am i doing? studies is going down hill too? arghz!!! tommorrow's test, i will sure screwed it up! fail the whole paper man! arghz... what can i say? all the best to myself man. i dont wish to add on anymore! that's all for today! i am pissed! fuck sia! =(

XINNI IS SUFFERING FROM SERIOUS INJURIES IN THE MIND!!! HELP HER!

i miss you so.
8:13 PM

Are you a stranger to me???

Today went out shopping with mummy. i bought 1 tank top from topshop and ear-rings. hahas. so happy la. so long never go out with mummy le. she was like complaining that everytime. so today, she asks me to go out shopping with her, so i just went. guess what? today my mummy suppose buy clothes but end up i am the one who buys clothes. hahas. mummy, i love u. =)

Haven't been going out with mummy for so long. The feeling is like kinda strange to me. bcoz it have been a long ever since i go out with only my mummy. can u imagine? in the mrt, i dont know what to talk to her. I keep wanting to find a topic to talk to her. but it just dont come to my mind. ends up, throughout the ride, i was listening to my mp3 and my mummy was reading her own book. woah... it just feel so weird to me. It's like telling ppl that i only know my mum for 1 weeks or less. can u imagine i got no topic to talk to my mum? i dont think i am fit to be her daughter at all. never given so care and concern to her. what's my reason for this? i am jsut too busy in school?or i have been spending most of my times with my friends rather than my family? Last time, i will always have family dinner with my parents. no matter what. but now? i just choose to eat out with friends rather than eating at home with my parents. what happen to me? nowadays, things get even worst! i choose to go home late rather than go home straight after school. i keep telling my friends that i dont feel like going home so early. what lead to all this? sighs! even my boyfriend scolds me for this. He is worrying at home whether am i back home, but where am i? i am enjoying outside with friends. sorry darling... woah... what's all these? getting from bad to worst? or what? i am tired! i hate to be at home. hear all the nagging and quarrelling sounds? all this make me CRAZY!!! arghz... sorry daddy, you will always call me to make sure i am safely back home. i make everyone worry for me. especially my parents and darling. sorry guys! i will change for the better.

That's all for today. take care guys!

rest well. =)

i miss you so.
8:56 PM

DARLING I LOVE YOU!!!

我爱你!!!

ZHEN HAO, I LOVE YOU!!!

我爱你!!!

YOU ARE MY DEAREST DARLING!!!

THANKS FOR EVERYTHING YOU GIVE ME, I APPRECIATED IT.

i miss you so.
12:16 AM

How am i feeling now? i am sick! everything seems going so wrong.. my head is spinning round and round.. the feeling of vomitting is horrible.. i hate being sick.. not good at all.. anyone cares for me when i am sick? who man? him? ya.. he will and he will just msg me me and ask if i am alright. okay fine. today, i end school at 11a.m. accompany my friend to food court 1 to have lunch but i didnt have my lunch with them. at about 12 plus, i went to meet him and have lunch together with him. guess what? when i reach clubroom, he wasnt there at all. i dont even see a single shadow of him.. nevermind, i call kian tat to open the clubroom for me but he didnt answer my call. so indeed, i have to wait at the door for him. when he reach there, teng lui came to clubroom room and open the door. then, i went to have lunch with him and teng lui.. after lunch, we went back to clubroom and slag. because 3.30p.m got committee meeting in the clubroom. so i just have to wait inside. in the midst of waiting, i continue to watch 200 pounds beauty. after that i was feeling damm tired and i took a rest.. he was sleeping.. after that, i have the meeting and went dinner with mel, tenglui and chee leng. i regret having dinner. now, i am suffering.. the feeling of vomitting is really terrible. hate it to the core man! i am sick! i am tired! i am dying.. and now, i am there blogging when i am suppose to be doing my tutorial. arghz! that's all. hey guys, please take care of urself. rest well. =)

* darling, pls take care of urself. your cough has been getting worst! drink lots of water and take your medicine according to the timing. love you always. *hugs&kisses*

i miss you so.
8:21 PM

love u...


a warm soft cheek landed on mine.. a sweet feeling rushed through my body as he whispered in my ear.. it felt as if we were sharing a sercret that the rest of the world didn't know.. i smiled to myself as i looked into his eyes and wondered is it fate that we met?


i love him.


as days passed, i realised that i am really in love in him. love, its such an undescrible feeling. when i look into his eyes, i feel as if i've known him my whole life. when i'm in his arms, i just wanna to hold him as tight as possible and make sure i never let it go.. the feeling is powerful and scary.. the moments i open my eyes, the first thing i want to do is to look at him.. he is the one that will be with me to support and motivate me.. he will be with me for my life.. i just love him so much..


today i took mrt with him.. then he told me something damm shocking. guess what? going to australia to study for 2 years or going australia got sailing training for 1 year? omg?! how can i take it in such a go? after hearing, i stop for awhile.. am i dreaming or am i afraid of something? i know for myself. i am very dependent on my bf. so can u imagine the life without him when actually we are so in love with each other? woah... i am just too dependent on him.. i need to grow up.. i will support u in what u do. no matter how far u go or even go long u go.. please dont get too emotional when u tell me all these things. i am just concern for u. dont worry darling, i will always be there for u.


throughout these fews days, things have been going on smoothly.. we can get along better than before.. this is what makes me happy.. i really hope all this honeymoon periods will go on forever and never stops.. i dont wish for anything.. i only wants him to be with me forever. this is how much i love him..


i'm afraid to lose what i have now.. i've given all my heart.. i've taken a gamble.. i've decided to jump into the unknown.. if i gona to lose this bet, everything will be gone.. i trust and put my whole heart into this relationship..


come what it may..


i gave u my whole heart. don't let me down. i love you.



me!


darling and me.

what a blurr look u have, my dear?

arghz! u spoilt my photo! hahas. =)

i miss you so.
9:52 PM